"I Killed Bob"

BREAKING News! Bob Wolmer's murder mystery resolved

In response to the fervent [heart-wrenching] appeal by the Jamaican DCP Mark Shields to "the killers to turn themselves in", Greg Chappel -the coach of the Indian Cricket team - said "I did!".

Professional rivalry and Rage killing are being touted as the reason behind the murder. Greg had worked really hard along with the Indian cricket "think tank" to hog the limelight and ensure the first round exit of the Indian Cricket team from the Workd Cup 2007. But Bob somehow infringed on Greg's idea and undid Greg's humongous efforts by stealing the thunder with Pakistan's 3-day-earlier exit from the first round of the Cricket World Cup.

Another senior player in the Indian cricket squad is also said to have helped Greg in his vengence.

Senior ICC officials, refusing to be named, said "The pressure to FAIL is so high in a forum such as the World Cup that such unfortunate incidents happen. In future we would plan better and give these two friendly yet emotionally charged neighbours an equal chance to fail."

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You know.. the solution to India's [non]performance is not to hire an external coach, but to hire an entire team... maybe we can hire the Australians to play for India. I am sure the BCCI has enough funds, even otherwise, we can invite a public private partnership to fund the buyout... the bookies would more than welcome the effort and join in the process.